socksuke_uchiha ([personal profile] socksuke_uchiha) wrote in [community profile] rpanons2024-10-02 08:27 pm

the masses thirst for the smallest drop of wank

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(Anonymous) 2024-10-31 08:55 pm (UTC)(link)
i didn't say faceless stranger

i said your knitting group, who are just hobby buddies just like rp

(Anonymous) 2024-10-31 08:57 pm (UTC)(link)
yes but this thread is about making plans with people who have thrown up an anonymous ad

my knitting group is not a faceless stranger who threw up an anonymous ad

they would be people i have regular interactions with

they are different things

(Anonymous) 2024-10-31 08:58 pm (UTC)(link)
>they would be people i have regular interactions with

so? they aren't your friends. which is the whole argument anon is making. apparently using manners on anyone that isn't your loved ones makes you "overinvested"

(Anonymous) 2024-10-31 09:00 pm (UTC)(link)
i don't think that's what anon is saying at all. I think you're conflating the arguments of multiple anons and imposing your own bias on what they're saying.

(Anonymous) 2024-10-31 09:02 pm (UTC)(link)
anon literally said "if you're not friends"

it's the comment i replied to

https://rpanons.dreamwidth.org/96896.html?thread=280288896#cmt280288896

(Anonymous) 2024-10-31 08:59 pm (UTC)(link)
buddy, there is a huge difference between a real world obligation that has people planning to meet in a location and do a certain thing and an online hobby that you can do while you're taking a shit and scooping your cat litter. you're in your home. you're waiting online. you can do fifty things while waiting for a psl. and even if they show up, it's not like it'll be a whole block of time that you have them for, like a rl knitting group. you might only get one whole tag. a week. you can tag back any time.

but you're going to equate a real world timed meet up event with refreshing your inbox? just go find someone else. or watch a show. or write some fanfic. it's not that deep, dude.

(Anonymous) 2024-10-31 09:00 pm (UTC)(link)
it's also not that deep to think that communicating with other adults should be the default, not something people should go to great lengths to explain why no one does that ever.

(Anonymous) 2024-10-31 09:02 pm (UTC)(link)
i have eighteen other psls going. i don't always remember what doesn't work for me. i've also had people drop things mid-thread and never tag again. and i move on, because you're investing too much personal emotional attachment into something that is ephemeral.

+1

(Anonymous) 2024-10-31 09:04 pm (UTC)(link)
anon i think you hit the nail on the head. people are afraid of confronting the fact that their mediocre work doesn't attract people to continue with them. we all have many things going at once, there's very little time and space for bkst randoms who want a full testimony about why their bakugo is mid.

-1

(Anonymous) 2024-10-31 09:08 pm (UTC)(link)
i think people who immediately jump to "you all must be mediocre writers" are the most shit writers in hobby, honestly. it's a lot of projection.

Re: -1

(Anonymous) 2024-10-31 09:11 pm (UTC)(link)
if people are ghosting you, there's some kind of disconnect. not necessarily talent-based. just move on if you're in demand? i don't get it anon...

Re: -1

(Anonymous) 2024-10-31 09:12 pm (UTC)(link)
I think the main issue here is less the act of ghosting itself and more that people seem to disagree on whether or not manners should or should not include sending a message when you drop a planned activity.

Re: -1

(Anonymous) 2024-10-31 09:15 pm (UTC)(link)
this might be cultural too actually. sometimes saying less and letting people bow out with dignity is just kinder. we all know how to take the hint... personally i'd way prefer just polite silence.

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(Anonymous) 2024-10-31 09:05 pm (UTC)(link)
found the person who's dropping everyone in every rpanons woe thread, probably

(Anonymous) 2024-10-31 09:07 pm (UTC)(link)
found the person whose inbox is empty ;)

(Anonymous) 2024-10-31 09:08 pm (UTC)(link)
glances at my 50 current tags and says "ok"

(Anonymous) 2024-10-31 09:09 pm (UTC)(link)
loving how you had to defend that with a random statistic

da

(Anonymous) 2024-10-31 09:10 pm (UTC)(link)
How is a solid number a random statistic?

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ayrt

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(Anonymous) 2024-10-31 09:06 pm (UTC)(link)
there's a difference between accidentally forgetting something and actually defending lack of communication

dwrp has made lack of communication the default, and that's a problem

+1

(Anonymous) 2024-10-31 09:09 pm (UTC)(link)
Someone here keeps trying to make it a "people forget" issue when half the responders are arguing for making a clear and deliberate decision to flake without saying anything.

(Anonymous) 2024-10-31 09:11 pm (UTC)(link)
it's really not. it's called trial and error. when i first came to rp, i was really big on replying to everything, and feeling pressured into replying when i didn't want to. when someone asked for something, depending on who it was, it was either a job of trying ot word it so they didn't take it personally, or knowing they would anyway and readying myself for the deluge of how i'm a horrible shitbag and ruined their life.

there are plenty of people that have asked me things in bs, either in dms or on the thread itself depending on their comfort levels of public private communication. some of them take 'thank you for the offer, but no' really well and just move on. others try to argue me into why their version of xyz is unlike the versions i like and if i just give them a chance, they'll prove it. they drag it out. they're rude and in denial. i am tired of playing the gamble of how someone will respond and prefer to just ignore at this point when it's something i'm not up for. i receive the same behavior and my butt is not flustered. sometimes, i'll tag someone with a scenario and get radio silence and i take that as a 'no, thank you'. other times, i forget about it entirely and a month later i get 'hey, sorry, i was in a bind and just got to this, yes i'm interested', i tag back, and radio silence again. i pretty much forget about it five minutes after it's done.

my attention and time is focused on the tags in my inbox, not on all the potential tags i'm not getting and how i can nag someone into giving me what i want, despite their own personal interest, and how that person i tagged three weeks ago should come to me with hat in hand an a gilded apology letter with sparkles and money in it.

stop fucking caring so much. i legitimately mean that. you will feel much less stress over rping if you just stop taking it so personally.

(Anonymous) 2024-10-31 09:13 pm (UTC)(link)
"all the potential tags i'm not getting and how i can nag someone into giving me what i want, despite their own personal interest, and how that person i tagged three weeks ago should come to me with hat in hand an a gilded apology letter with sparkles and money in it"

this is way overselling what "hey, i'm not interested" is or should be.

(Anonymous) 2024-10-31 09:21 pm (UTC)(link)
that's fucking bullshit

i've been saying "not interested, but thanks anyway" for years and i only had idiots overreacting twice. in a fucking decade.

this has the same vibes of people who say they aren't honest with their preferences because they're afraid of some imaginary backslash, meanwhile i see people on bakerstreet happily playing while having things like "no ocs" or "castmates only" on their preferences all the fucking time

it's amazing the lengths dwrp goes through to avoid being honest. they're always afraid of some boogeyman that doesn't exist. "o-oh i can't do that because... reasons!"

also stop throwing "overinvested", "stressed", and all those buzzwords. nobody here is crying over abandoned tags. it's just a simple "i wish people would communicate" thing. you're doing the equivalent of "u mad?" to make the responders look worse than they actually sound

+1

(Anonymous) 2024-10-31 09:22 pm (UTC)(link)
Same, I can count on one hand the number of times I've gotten a negative response to a simple PM about not feeling a PSL or losing a muse for the character or whatever. People usually thank me for letting them know!

nayrt

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+1

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(Anonymous) 2024-10-31 09:24 pm (UTC)(link)
i think everyone in this argument could benefit from walking away from it for a little while

(no subject)

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